St Vincent On Being Out of Her Mind

St. Vincent’s touring schedule sent her “out of [her] mind”.

St Vincent recalled how the multiple live shows she played in support of her eponymous 2014 album grew increasingly “outlandish” and she put herself at risk of getting serious injured on several occasions.

She said: “It started off pretty composed but as we did more and more and I was just touring so much, I was truly out of my mind.

“Those shows became more outlandish. Climbing scaffolding, 20, 30 feet up in the air.

“I was climbing speakers – I almost seriously hurt myself a couple of times. I mean, I was out of my mind. Of my mind.

“That was a wild time of life. I was absolutely feral.”

Although St. Vincent – who was dating model Cara Delevingne at the time – doesn’t regret that period, she wishes someone around her had told her to take a break.

In interview with MOJO magazine, she said: “I don’t look back on it with regret. I do look back on it and go, ‘Oh man, I wonder why the people who were helping me with my career at that time didn’t say, ‘Hey, let’s slow down.’ You know, ‘Let’s take these couple weeks off.’

“I didn’t have support in that regard. I do wonder why people who could have didn’t – but I don’t have those people in my life any more.

“I do look back at pictures like, ‘Oh man, I look almost dead. Who’s that person?’”

And the rigidity that followed with her next album, 2017’s ‘Masseduction’, was a deliberate response to the chaos.

She said: “I was in a very low place, late 2016, early 2017.

“I was in a very low place and I got physically sick. It was a stomach issue which was sort of elusive, I never did find out exactly what it was.

“I’m sure it was just stress but it became hard to eat.

“It was like my body just said, ‘OK, you’re going to go on a complete reset.’

“I was sick so I stopped eating certain things that seemed to exacerbate the sickness and I stopped drinking anything and I had this incredibly rigid life so I could hold on.

“In a way, I was incredibly strict with my mind. I was strict with my body.

“I was strict in a lot of ways with the music – that’s why I think it’s angular, it’s jagged, it’s angry, it’s abrasive. I was holding on for dear life.”

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